As JK Rowling’s natural enemy I want to write some smut with her content

Larry’s Duaghter

A Harry Potter spoof

“

One day he was here and the next day he wasn’t.

Life changes and time flies and it all breaks your heart when it ends.

But looking back, I’m glad my kid got a great education.

I’m glad I was able to send her to school at a place where she really found herself.

I don’t think a lot of people really get that anymore.

She learned to think and be independent and she’s a bitch.

“

• Larry

One day Harry was sleeping and this big ass man came in and told him he was going to be something special.

Harry, who would become Harriet, he/she/they are transgender, but that comes in the future not now.

Harry and Handgrip were on the way to a story with a big ass snake, the stone of wonder, and all kinds of good shit.

The kind of shit that makes you feel alive and fulfilled.

Life wasn’t easy for Harry being treated poorly by his family. So this opportunity to become a wizard, was like right up his alley.

Rob, a fiery-red haired dude Harry knew was also going to attend the same school.

They met an awesome liberal black chick too.

These three kids would be bunking together at the school

They all got into the same house in Hogwax 

They were divided into houses based on personality and whether they looked good in a hat or not.

Maltose was a guy who would become a total pessimist at the school and would serve as an emotional drain on Harry, Ron, and Honey (that’s the black friend’s name)

That’s the end of the intro I guess, you have a firm groundwork for what these kids are up to.

Chapter 1

Harry: Look, I’ve always been into treating people with respect even if they treat me like shit.

My parents treated me like shit, saying all kids of shit to me, just a garbage life.

I’m super grateful to be out here though at Hogwax 

Like the ability to get an education at this level is not something everyone has access to.

And the dementors are really kinda hot, just how dommy they are.

But I want to say something about that Maltose kid from the Green Party.

He’s honestly a real peice of shit.

I’m not trying to get kicked out of here but like I got to set some boundaries with this hole.

Honey: You can totally talk to him

I’ve heard he smokes weed and is pretty cool

I think he’s just got some shit he’s going through.

I think he just wants to be seen.

That’s why he acts like a jackass, not that it’s cool, but that’s why.

If you can relate to him, I think y’all could be for real with each other

But that’s up to you.

He is an ass and you don’t owe him anything.

Ron: agrees

Harry: I appreciate that, I’m open minded, but I’m also not going to let this keep happening.

Not really sure what I’ll do. Sometimes that bullying stuff turns me on a bit

I’m still figuring everything out, but when he like grabs my nipples or ass, I’m like kinda fluttery about it.

I feel uncomfortable because it’s like in front of of my friends and teachers, but then again, that’s also confusing because I’m totally an exhibitionist.

(All the people in this book are above 18 years of age or whatever the age in your region of consent is – This is a collage, not a primary school. That’s why there’s a good amount of swearing.)

Honey: Can you cool it? I get it with the horny stuff, but like, I’m tryna vibe here, and I don’t want to think about you like that right now.

Harry: yeah, gets up and goes to bedroom

Maltose: bullies Harry – yo, are you trying to hide from me?

Harry: I’m just a bit uncomfortable man

Maltose: I love you bro, I’m just tryna play with you

Harry: I know you have your own stuff going on, but like it’s a bit much

Maltose: But you like this and we’re cool

Harry: I just think I’ve got to be in the right headspace for you to be like this and for me to be okay with it.

I don’t think it’s wrong all the time, just might be unwelcome when I’m like studying or giving a presentation in front of the class.

(Takes this as a rejection of friendship and is annoyed, he goes to his room and pops one of the gummies and chills out. But before he leaves, he said “yeah man” like a bit offended or hurt)

Harry: That dude can’t solve all of his problems with avoidance

I feel like if he just was like, “hey dude, I’m feeling xyz way and I want to ram this up your butt because you’re the person I want to take this out on.”

If he said that, I’d be ready for it and might be even in a mood to be humiliated and brought inside of myself for a bit.

I don’t think it even really has to be anything sexual, because it never really does have to just be that.

It can be like, I want to write on you, I want to paint your nails, I want to change your clothes in the locker room to women’s clothes

You know what I mean just shit that’s like going to turn me on low key.

I don’t think either of us look at our relationship in that way, but if we did, we might be able to be some kind of compatible with that as like a thing we do sometimes.

Just boundaries and feelings.

Ron: I’m really tired of you talking about this shit. Man, I’m just tryna vibe

Harry: Sorry, I’ve got a lot on my mind right now

I’m going to talk to Maddie.

(Maddie is this awesome chill girl that doesn’t really have any romantic things going on at the school because she’s so focused on her future right now. She probably has high anxiety, but she has a soft voice and is a bit ethereal. She seems like kind of the prettiest cryer ever. She’s got some kind of vibe going on.)

(So Harry and Maddie are talking.)

(Harry is emotion dumping on Maddie just like he’s been doing with others earlier in the day.)

Harry: I appreciate you listening you’re a really kind person. Probably the kindest person who’s ever existed.

Not that you have to be that to be cool. Like you can be or feel your way.

Maddie: No, I get you. I appreciate that 🙂

Have you considered maybe talking with Maltose about this and feelings

Harry: I feel like he’s be even more weird about it

Maddie: but like why? Why would anything he could do make this more weird

You’re basically at a point where you’re suffering and so is Maltose

But you could move to a point where both of you are not suffering

Even if Maltose completely disregards everything you say and uses it to make fun of you in front of the whole school, is that really different than what’s going on now?

Isn’t that part of the game he’s already playing?

Harry: yeah, I guess it is. There’s just something there that feels wrong. Something that feels like incorrect about that. Something that’s making me feel like, that’s not really what I would do in the situation.

Maddie: Do you have any judgements about Maltose?

Like if you were to give yourself permission to be the most judgmental person of him you possibly could.

What would you say?

Harry: I’d say Maltose shouldn’t be humiliating me

Maltose should act right

Maltose should treat others with respect

Maltose should talk about Maltose’s feelings.

Maddie: okay, so could you say that you could be all those things right?

Harry shouldn’t be humiliating Harry

Harry should act right

Harry should treat others with respect

Harry should talk about Harry’s feelings.

And that what Maltose is doing is exactly what he should be doing because that’s what he is doing.

I’m not saying I like what he’s doing, but I just think it is what it is, and in order to change it we need to see it from an angle where we can examine how you can change things because you’re the only person that can change anything about you.

Harry: Sure, I get that

The worst case here isn’t the end of the world.

I think I can do that and be okay with it.

(Harry talks to Maltose about this, Maltose responds by saying, “the length of this ‘scene’ is forever and the punishments I’ll give you are whatever I want whenever I want with as much warning as I feel like giving you.” So basically some kind of rejection of what Harry is saying. But Maltose still has heard and understood it, so this is interesting. Maltose does use this conversation as emotional blackmail for Harry and it is a strange situation, but later in the book, they’ll sort this out and come to some kind of beautiful thing. Not a relationship with each other, but more of an understanding and inner acceptance that both of them have and that leads to success in their future relationships.)

(Meanwhihe, there’s a snake below the school that stole a rock. Harry and the band need to get that rock back to the professor, because it’s a really sick polished geode)

(Also I thought of a cool scene between Harry and ‘her’ wife later in life. Right because Harry is trans and becomes Harriet at some point. So let’s go to that scene and come back to the snake later.)

Harriet’s wife (Birgi, God of Peace)

Harriet: Oh my god, don’t read that

Birgi: Do you want me to read it or not?

Harriet: Well like I want you to, but I want you to like overpower me not wanting you to.

Birgi: I’m not going to do things you don’t want me to do. You need to tell me that you want this or I won’t do it.

Harriet: Yes, I want you to read it.

Birgi: If we’re going to be doing shit like that, we will talk about consent up front and know how long we’re going to do this for and we will have a safe word. Even if it’s all the time, we need to have basically scene periods we evaluate how we feel week over week or day over day and whatnot.

You can’t just be like unclear about boundaries and expect to seriously have an intimate emotional connection with someone through BDSM if you’re basically not one with your feelings enough to have that conversation.

I get that me being your Goddess dommy mommy and whatnot is what you want and for us to be in sync and for us to both be getting emotional gratification out of this and you want that long term, but that means we need to have even more conversations, not just this, “I don’t want you to do xyz, when I really do want you to” stuff.

That kind of thing fucks this up for both of us.

Harriet: Yeah I totally get that

Birgi: even like calling me names and shit randomly is weird when we hadn’t discussed that, it’s just like being caught off guard and uncomfortable.

Harriet: I’m sorry. I hadn’t thought of that really.

Birgi: What the fuck is this?

Your writing is crazy

Will you stop writing sex fantasies about me, Jesus Christ.

Harriet: It’s not really about you though, it’s like a crazy image in my head of what I want in life that I project onto everything.

Birgi: That sounds toxic

Harriet: I can abstract it more. I can be like, not talking about things we do directly.

Maybe I could talk more about how I feel and how I want to feel.

I think that publicity of who I am and what I do is a part of my ethos I don’t really talk about very much.

That like, I want to be the kind of person who feels like more than just a body.

I see the things I create in the world and I see them later, like templates someone used on their website, or videos people watched to figure something out.

I’m willing to talk about that, I just need something from the feeling of being seen by others and for content I create to intimately be felt by others.

Birgi: We don’t need to have that conversation right now, but I do want to know what you’re doing because it feels invasive or at least not asked for.

I get that you’re trying to be something interesting or that you’re trying to unlock some kind of personal fulfillment or self actualization here.

It feels like a subversion of expectations. Not that what you’re doing is wrong or that I wouldn’t be okay with it, but that I didn’t expect it. I feel like I was blind sided by it.

I don’t want to feel used like that. It doesn’t really make me feel appreciated. It makes me feel creeped out.

Harriet: I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I do miss talking to you a lot. You being creepy to me was so cool. Was like the coolest thing ever.

I know you probably want to sit with your feelings for a while and I respect that.

I suppress my feelings all the time to avoid the overwhelm of crippling social anxiety.

I want us to be in sync. And I want to do what that takes. I feel like we’re at a point now where I can’t get through to you or that you think my thinking is insane or that I’m too caught up in something I shouldn’t be.

I know I’m lost. I know I’m twisted around in circles. And for years what I lacked was the ability to feel my own emotions.

I know what I want to do now is shadow work and figuring out who I am and whatnot. But I feel a whole in my heart having hurt you. I don’t want you to feel blindsided, I care about how you feel inside all the time.

Even when I go years without seeing you.

—————

(Back to the snake, so we’re at a point where Harry and the group are going to take this snake down to get some polished geodes back for Dumbledraft the school principle. It’s really an enigma why these kids work so hard for Dumbledraft when he basically gets their asses in trouble all the time.)

(I feel it though, I used to be a total teacher’s pet. I was like, not wanting to dissapoint them in any way. And having their approval made me feel good. Feeling like I was a ‘good boy’ was what I wanted at the time. I liked that feeling.)

(So in the sewer under the school, the evil wizard’s snake or whatever was pretty easily killable because it really had a hard time moving through the pipes. They were able to cut it off and suffocate it which was really not a pleasant scene, because it sucks to kill a life like that, but it was basically a whale under the women’s bathroom of the school, so there’s not a lot of great ways to get it back to a sanctuary where it could survive.)

(Dumbledraft gets his rocks back, Harry is both a good boy and a pain slut and would eventually become transgender so more identity problems would be fixed. Pretty good story all around. I rate this 10/10. Where I think the original Harry Potter series is about a or 6 out of 10.)