I don’t see a lot of content in my face around what it means to be a sub femme kind of person.

The pleasure in servitude and what the center of it all is.

I want to explore that more and learn more about not only arousing storylines, but what underlying motivates those storylines.

What underlying feelings are being activated as a part of those arousal tendencies and where they come from for me.

Some individuals, the relinquishment of control can be deeply arousing. Being submissive allows them to let go of responsibility and decision-making, which can be liberating and erotic.

ChatGPT

This is a generic answer, that’s something obvious

Submissive individuals often find great intimacy and connection in trusting their partner to take control.

ChatGPT

I like this answer more touching into why trust might be important to that person in a deeper way. Being bonded to another individual’s will is not liberating in and of itself. There’s 100% something deeper going on.

Of course related to sexual development, but I mean more of not why those tendencies developed in terms of what happened, but how what happened results in individuals developing these feelings.

Why did I develop submissive feelings as a result of being smothered.

Why would that be the feelings my brain decides to develop? Others with the same interests had similar experiences that developed their brain the same way but why does the brain respond in taht way?

Is it to cope? Is it to find acceptance in your situation?

The vulnerability inherent in submission can deepen the bond between partners.

The association between arousal and seemingly negative stimuli like violence or unpleasant smells can seem counterintuitive, but it often ties back to the complexity of human sexuality and the way our brains process stimuli.

Society often teaches us to avoid or condemn certain behaviors, so engaging in them can feel exhilarating or transgressive.

Additionally, sensory play is a common aspect of BDSM, and some individuals may find the intensity of certain sensations, even if they’re unpleasant, to be sexually stimulating.

In BDSM dynamics, violence is not about actual harm but rather about power exchange and control. The dominant partner may engage in activities that appear violent (such as spanking or bondage) within a consensual context.

Some BDSM activities, including those involving pain or discomfort, can trigger the release of endorphins and adrenaline, which are natural pain-relieving and pleasure-inducing chemicals in the brain.

This can create a unique physiological response where sensations of pain are interpreted as pleasure. To each their own, these are of course developed from past experiences and so would be different for each individual.

ChatGPT

I would guess that my arousal engaging in these types of activities is somehow related to a need for perfection and not being enough.

The psychological need to be comfortable for me being based off of something regarding the sacred feminine and sacred masculine. And how my relationship to those things is out-of-whack.

Not in a way that’s inherently negative, but in a way that’s inherently weird.

The next thing I asked the robot was:

“Why would being made to feel as though someone is not enough, why would that make someone aroused? Often this type of play is done in accordance with cuckolding and humiliation.”

For some individuals, feelings of inadequacy or humiliation can be tied to deeper psychological dynamics, such as low self-esteem or a desire for validation.

Engaging in play that involves these themes can provide a sense of catharsis or release by confronting and exploring these emotions.

Humiliation play often involves a power dynamic in which one partner takes on a dominant role while the other assumes a submissive role. The submissive partner may find arousal in surrendering control and being “put in their place” by the dominant partner.

The thrill of transgressing boundaries and exploring forbidden desires can intensify arousal.

Being emotionally vulnerable and exposed to the judgment or control of another person can create a heightened state of arousal and emotional connection between partners.

This can include scenarios in which one partner is made to feel inadequate or inferior in some way, fulfilling a specific fantasy or desire for both partners.

The act of surrendering to these feelings within a consensual and controlled context can provide a sense of acceptance and belonging.

ChatGPT

This is very insightful for understanding why someone not engaging in that type of vulnerability in intimate relationships with me ends up in me feeling less connected to them and less aroused by them and attracted to them.

So the turnaround here for me is to inquire with the robot about why dominant individuals receive a benefit emotionally from these types of intimate engagements

Humiliation play allows the dominant partner to exercise control by dictating the terms of the interaction and setting boundaries.

Some dominants derive pleasure from inflicting psychological or emotional discomfort on their submissive partner as part of a consensual power exchange.

This can be a form of sensual sadism, where the dominant enjoys the psychological intensity and emotional vulnerability of the scene.

The vulnerability of the submissive partner can create a strong bond and sense of intimacy between partners.

Similarly, the thrill of transgressing societal norms and pushing boundaries can be arousing for some dominants. Engaging in a sadistic personality not usually socially acceptable.

Engaging in humiliation play allows dominants to express their creativity and imagination in designing scenes and scenarios that cater to their partner’s desires.

ChatGPT

What was the developmental stimulant for these dominant individuals to come to engage with that type of dynamic in the first place. Is it a lack of normally feeling in control or that they can set boundaries?

Some individuals naturally possess dominant personality traits, such as assertiveness, confidence, and leadership skills. These traits may predispose them to gravitate towards roles of authority and control within interpersonal relationships.

Exercising control and authority in a consensual context may provide a sense of validation, empowerment, or fulfillment that they may not experience in other areas of their lives.

Engaging in structured power exchange relationships allows them to set clear boundaries, establish rules, and dictate the terms of the interaction, which can be gratifying for individuals who value control and structure.

Some individuals may be drawn to dominant roles because they excel in these areas and enjoy the process of negotiating boundaries, desires, and consent with their partners.

Engaging in BDSM dynamics, including dominant roles, can be a journey of self-discovery and personal growth for some individuals. Through exploration and experimentation, they may gain a deeper understanding of their own desires, boundaries, and identities.

ChatGPT

What might these individuals be attracted to in the process of social discourse and finding potential relationship partners?

Dominants may be attracted to partners who are articulate, open-minded, and able to express their needs and desires clearly.

Trust is paramount in BDSM dynamics, and dominants may prioritize partners who demonstrate honesty, reliability, and integrity.

Dominants value partners who respect their boundaries and consent. They may be attracted to individuals who demonstrate an understanding of BDSM etiquette, consent culture, and the importance of respecting limits and boundaries.

Dominants may be drawn to individuals who share similar interests, fantasies, or desires.

Dominants may be attracted to partners with whom they share a strong emotional, physical, and sexual connection.

ChatGPT

The last two points feel obvious, but maybe I don’t fully feel it. I know it on a logical level, but not a deep emotional level. That’s a concept I’m coming to know more and more and I’m loving engaging in that process.

It’s a liberating engagement.

Do I demonstrate honesty, and integrity, and reliability, in my relationships?

I know I have these traits as a person overall, but looking at my relationships, I don’t think I demonstrate these qualities. I think I more demonstrate qualities of hiding my emotions (lying), folding to what others want me to do (lack of integrity), not communicating (unreliability).

That’s useful shit to feel. Useful to understand for me. I didn’t really think about this as what was going on. Trying to please other people so I would not have to sleep alone and hoping they would fill in all these communication, control, and power, dynamic gaps is my problem.

I feel as though I treat others with an open mind, but this might not be true. I don’t treat myself with an open mind of acceptance. I say deprecating things and if I don’t respect myself and others can sense that, then there’s a feeling that I don’t respect anyone else.

If we can’t respect ourselves, can we truly respect anyone else at a deep level. I don’t really think so. We can be nice. We can be what we perceive to be kind, but I don’t think we can truly be kind.

I think about the relationship I fucked up the most that I wish wasn’t fucked up. I wish it was still together. I wish it had gone differently.

In that relationship, I didn’t demonstrate any writing to this person.

She knew I did art, because she could see murals I made to say, “look I do art”

One mural came from my heart. The rest were attempts to get attention because the first one got attention.

Art comes from the heart and my heart was closed and I can see that very clearly now.

Being vulnerable is uncomfortable, the writing I do, the real art I make, I struggle to accept it enough to show it to those I care about the most and those who care about me the most.

That creates a barrier to the connection between us.